Blog

My aunt got 30 new pools in her backyard but her customers were not pleased because only one of them was clothing-optional. Then everyone at the pool got into teams and dressed up like ancient warriors. Daniel and I were on the Roman team. The battle began and our heads were chopped off almost instantly. Our spirits decided to go to a nearby building that was supposedly haunted by celebrity ghosts. The interior was dazzling, the walls and floors were in constant motion. There was some kind of secret church service going on and typewriters were the only form of communication.

I was walking around Paris with Teena and we met her fiancé in an underground restaurant with a glass roof. The three of us ate together and I kept quiet during their conversation. They picked an ‘80s power ballad to sing to each other at the wedding. They also decided to circumcise any and all of their future sons.

I was at my dad’s cabin near Pagosa Springs with Lacey, her younger sisters, her parents, and her grandmother. Bison were visible from the deck and there was a new shelf with hygiene products for sale. I wanted to steal some of the products until I spotted a security camera. Lacey and I shared a bed and we stayed up late watching cartoons and talking about WordPress. We went to a dance competition and that was the only time we left the cabin. I wore a suit and Lacey wore a light green dress, light gray tights, and silver Versace heels. The dancing involved changing partners every few seconds. I was pretty good at the ballroom dancing and pretty bad at the hip-hop dancing.

Governor Ritter was delivering mail to my address. He told me he was inspired by an essay that I wrote. The essay was about education being too expensive. He gave me an envelope that contained $150,000. Then I went back inside and played with Warped Tour themed Legos. Then a Republican came out of the bathroom and unsuccessfully tried to get me vote for his guy. Then he left.

My mom and I were driving in the mountains and we came across a large cemetery that had many visitors. The newer part of the cemetery didn’t have enough room for gravestones so ribbons were hung on the face of a cliff. We tried using a ladder to read the ribbons but the ladder kept falling because the cliff was too steep. There was a small statue in the older part of the cemetery that was very famous. One of my French ancestors from La Ferté-Macé must have carved the statue because their name was engraved on the back.